A Dolls' House Alphabet
by Val Hill
A
Accessories
Every house needs lots of these, it’s surprising how many,
and how much of the budget they swallow up (see ‘B’ and ‘F’ ).
B
Bank Account
Never large enough, frequently depleted (see 'F').
C
Car
Indispensable for transporting houses, ideally, should be big enough for two.
D
Dust
Occurs in human size houses to distract from doll houses.
E
End
As in finish. Rarely occurs.
F
Family
Useful if supportive (i.e. You want WHAT! For Christmas, Oh OK then.) If not, consider acquiring a new one.
G
Grecons
Small people with large personalities. Cost out of proportion to size. (see ‘A’ 'B' and 'F')
H
Holidays
A time for recuperation and an opportunity to search for new ideas and supplies.
I
Impoverished
A claim made by other family members. Irrelevant when viewing new purchases.
J
Jealousy
An emotion felt by many when viewing collections.
Don’t worry, this is natural, and it is highly probable that someone is jealous of yours.
K
Knuckles
Plasters must be applied immediately they are damaged, blood is very difficult to get out of wallpaper.
L
Lie
As in “That house? Oh I’ve had that old thing for ages”. To be avoided.
Most family members notice when a six bedroom doll house appears in the real house.
M
Meals
Most family members insist at attendance at these, even if it means leaving a project at an interesting stage.
N
Nails
Damage to these can be repaired at salons. However this does divert funds from important matters (see ‘A’).
O
Overpainting
This is part of the natural life cycle of a dolls house. Proud fathers become proud grandfathers and 'do up' the doll house. However, this is often done to vintage houses in gloss paint, disguising all the original features. (see 'S')
P
Peculiar
What the neighbours think of you when you play with Grecons in the garden.
Q
Queue
of jobs waiting to be done. Never gets smaller.
R
Room
Never enough. Consider moving family into garden shed.
S
Scapel
Useful for removing Gloss (see 'O'). Also good at removing skin from fingers.
T
Tacky
The stage of painting that pets and children are most drawn to.
U
Under the bed
A possible hiding place for new acquisitions from unsympathetic eyes.
V
Vermin
Can damage houses and contents. Many varieties, include woodworm, moths, spiders and children.
W
Wardrobe
Another possible hiding place (see 'O'). Alternate use is to fit with shelves to display houses.
Clothes can be kept in the garden shed.
X
Xenophobe
A person unduly fearful of foreign ideas such as Gottschalk or Lundby.
Y
Yearning
A common feeling when at fairs.
Z
Zeal
An excellent quality possessed in great amounts by many dollhouse collectors.
Photo credits: A:© Joan Joyce; C: © Deborah Green; D: © Rebecca Green; G: Hamleys catalogue; H: © diePuppenstubensammlerin; K: © Pinch of Pepper; M: © Valerie Towers; O: © Rebecca Green; R: © Zoe H.; S: © Celia Thomas of KT Miniatures; V: © Barbara King; W: © Christine Jaeger; Y: © Béatrice Dassonville.